How to Be Cool at the Gym

6 Jun

1. Perch a hat ever-so-precariously atop your head without ever actually pulling it on fully

2. Adorn your ripply muscles in a Gold’s Gym string tank top (a tank top with side slits down to your waist will also do the trick)

3. Always maintain a 2:1 workout ratio – two minutes of mirror-gazing for every one minute of exercise

4. Match your skin tone to your gym’s medicine balls

5. The larger the gold chain, the more appropriate it is to workout in

6. Forgo bathing for an extra dose of body spray

Bonus Tip for the Ladies: Food is for quitters!

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